PLUMBING DRAMA:
A GUIDE TO STOP THE CRAP PLUGGING UP SOCIAL PLUMBING
If you haven't joined the social networking band wagon by now, you'd probably never seen the amount of drama presented on many peoples personal pages. Often refered to as "walls" on Facebook, this guide will show you how to refrain from buying into negativity of the social site.It will assist you in posting positivity and also help you cope with what to do when negativity infects your social site.
The first thing you must do is create a Facebook account. To do this, you must first open your web browser. Windows users can hit the windows key and scroll up to the softwares default web browser Internet Explorer. Mac users please scroll to you dock and select Safari. Once the web browser loads, type in the web address www.facebook.com this will take you to Facebook's main site.
This site will provide a sign up form at the start up page. Proceed with filing out the form and select Sign up. You will be asked to enter various information about yourself. Please take some time to be cautious of what you put in this information. Anything you wouldn't want people to know about you should not be inserted as once it is on the internet, you are never able to take it back.
You will also be asked if you would like to upload pictures and do other various things to make experience more enjoyable. Do so with cation however as the more social you get on the internet, the more drama will incur.
Lastly you will be asked to add friends. Take this time to add personal friends first. Social networking sites are just that, for social networking. They are not personal hook up sites, nor hot or not profile sites. Rules do imply on social networks sites although some people ignore this fact.
Once your personal friends are added the best thing to do is go to your Privacy settings and adjust your new social network site to be private. This will help drama get ignored and also prevent unwanted people from seeing your information. To do this simply go to "privacy settings" under "account" in the top right hand corner.
Once that page loads, you will see your settings. "Friends Only" is the optimal setting preference. This will allow only the people on your friends list to see what you post. This however does not guarantee your privacy. If your friends decide to "share" anything you've posted, their friends will have access to it, so once again, be cautious of what you post.
Other settings on privacy can be found on this page as well. This guide is more about learning to keep the drama off your page, so further questions about privacy can be found on the same page near the bottom right. Click LEARN MORE, and Facebook will provided you with lots more on that topic. The "block list" option is also a handy feature which will will go into more deeply later, just remember for now that it is found on the privacy settings page.
Now that your privacy has been protected to some extent, and your friends have been added, you can now start sharing things. The best thing to remember is no one wants to hear negativity. That only allows for negativity to be plastered on you're wall. If you must air your dirty laundry on social sites for your friends to see, I would suggest calling them instead. Try posting highlights of your day. Maybe someone stood out and made you feel good, that would be a great story to share.
If you can't help but vent your frustrations remember to not include anyone's name. This will prevent other people who might know that person from telling them that your gossiping. It also helps prevent the topic from blowing way out of proportion. When you include names in your frustrations you are directly attacking that person and this causes your mutual friends to pick sides. Also on your post, you might consider using the "lock" feature located left of the "share" icon on the bottom of what your thinking of posting. By clicking this option you can choose who will or will not see your post. If you're knowingly attacking someone, I would recommended hiding the post from that person as well as any and all mutual friends.
When browsing other people's pages you will encounter their own form of negativity. Weather they are complaining about work, school, life, or anything else, it's your choice on what to respond to these posts with. I suggest looking for the silver lining of the post or at the very least offer them some advice or constructive criticism. Feeding into their negativity will increase the tension and stress on the topic and is causing drama, do not do this. No one wants a "Negative Nancy" as a friend. Also refrain from responding with cruel jokes on certain subject matters that might be deemed inappropriate. This also causes unneeded stress.
Also be cautious of what you post. Anything can and will be used against you if certain people are not adapted to your personality. Remember that cynical personalities or dark humor does not transfer to well onto the internet. The tone of your voice is not able to be portrayed into your text so any approach in this manner might be considered rude or offensive. If you must be cynical remind the readers that you are joking or emphasize the fact that you are being cynical. Remember, other people your friends have on their friends list might see your posts and they do not know how you are.
So what if you find someone who's picking a fight? You will encounter this many times on the internet, especially in social sites. Sometimes they might be your friends, sometimes complete strangers. In either case the best thing to do is not give into their drama. Try first by letting the person know where your stand on your views of the topic and that you respect theirs as well. Sometimes this will defuse the situation, however some arguments might escalate.
In case of an escalation you have a few options. You can either block the member so that you and them have no more further contact. To block a person you can visit their profile and on the bottom left side, chose the "block" feature. If you need to unblock later you can once again return to the Account options, and choose privacy settings. Then near the bottom, you will see the BLOCK options. Upon clicking that you will encounter a new window with all of those whom you have blocked. Chose the "x" located on the right of their name to remove them from the blocked list.
Another option you have in defusing an escalated user is to use the "Yes" sandwich. This is when you use a nice comment, followed by letting the user know to leave you alone, followed by another nice comment. This will compliment the user and make him look even more of a jerk. Remember not to give into the drama.
Using these steps will create an almost perfect, peaceful atmosphere for you to enjoy on your Facebook, or any other social networking site. Although nobodies lives are drama free, you will find a decrease in the amount on your page and in your life as opposed to others. If you ever do encounter a dramatic person, try sending them this guide, it might just change their experience.
